Elli (A Second Chance Novel Book 1) Page 34

  Ben usually would have greeted the dogs first, but this time, it was Elli he wanted to talk to most. “Surprise,” he managed, turning his palms upward in a gesture of surrender.

  She smiled a timid smile. “That it is.” She bit her lower lip and shushed the dogs as they started whining about her stopping their walk. They sat with their tails sweeping the ground.

  “I’m here for the fundraiser.” He took a step closer to Elli and bumped into dogs. He instinctively bent and petted the dog closest to him, Jenny. “I’m here to get answers from you.”

  She lifted her chin and straightened her back. He really loved the way she got her hackles stirred when putting up her defenses. “Okay. I owe you answers.” She looked at him, not backing away because it was tough. He’d learned that about her in the blogs- she didn’t back down from a fight. “I should have spoken to you before I left. I was a coward. I’m sorry. So very, very, sorry.”

  “I don’t buy the coward excuse.” He shook his head. “You’re not a coward. You are a tough lady who goes after what she wants with strength.” He paused, steadied his voice. “I don’t understand why you left the e-mails of your correspondences with investors interested in Sugar Mill. I could have lived my entire life not knowing about you going behind my back soliciting buyers, since you didn’t continue pursuing that. Why did you want me to know? Did you want me to hate you?”

  “What are you talking about? What e-mails?” Ben was surprised how genuinely shocked she looked.

  “The ones you left on the printer.” He stepped back a single pace. “Wait.” He held up his hand. “You didn’t know they were there.” He reminded her what letters he was talking about.

  “Oh God. No.” Her eyes were bright. “I forgot I had printed them to review. So much had happened that day. I forgot they were there.” She started to reach for his face, but pulled her hand back. “How awful for you to find them. I didn’t want you to know about it. I had contacted the interested parties and told them the deal was off before I left Sugar Mill.” She looked away. “What good would it have done if you knew that I was trying to find a solid buyer for Sugar Mill when that deal was over?”

  Ben looked at her a long time. When he had read each and every blog, he had heard Elli’s voice reading them to him in his head. He heard her fears, her worries, her triumphs and her loneliness. He not only heard it, he felt it heavy and real with every beat of his heart. He felt it now in her wide-bright eyed stare. On top of all that, he heard Beau’s voice, too. He was telling him that he had lost confidence in his judgment of character. His cousin was right and he intended to regain that right now, right here. Like he did with his dogs, he looked for the subtle signs of what was really being said. The flutter of her eyes. The lift of her hand to her throat. The change in her breathing. “I believe you, Elli.”

  “Thank you.” He saw her throat tighten as she swallowed. “I wanted to give you everything you wanted when I left. You deserved that. Joey deserved it. Your family deserved it.”

  “I didn’t get everything I wanted.” He pushed aside the dogs to stand closer to her. “How could I when I didn’t know what the hell I really wanted? I know now, Elli.”

  She tilted her head and looked at him with the most hurt and confused look in her baby blues. His heart squeezed in his chest again when her bottom lip began to quiver.

  “Please, Ben. You have the capacity to devastate me more than the cancer did.” Tears pooled in her eyes. “I’m begging you to watch your words with me. I’m not as strong as you think.”

  “Ah, cher, I’m screwing this up.” He ran a fingertip along her jaw. “My head turned to mush when I saw you come around that corner like a beautiful angel.” He inhaled deeply, trying to gather his thoughts. “I’m not forgiving what you did, Elli, but I understand it. I know that you were trying to find a way to save your family, just like I was mine. I get it. I’ve been chasing that since Sarah started using me and destroying my trust in humanity.” He folded his hand over hers. “If you hadn’t chiseled away at the crap encasing my heart, I would have been…lost.” Her tears began to flow now, and Ben didn’t know what to do about them. “Don’t cry, cher.” She wiped her eyes and left a large smudge of black makeup under her right eye. He smiled. “You are so damn cute.”

  “Ben,” she sighed. “I have to go. Thank you for being so kind and wonderful.” She swallowed hard. “I hope we have everything cleared up.” She turned in a hurry to leave him.

  “Wait.” He turned her to face him. “I’m not finished.”

  “Please Ben, don’t,” she said, swallowing back a sob.

  “Elli, I didn’t want to, but I do. I love you.”

  She swayed on her feet, and then locked her knees to stand steady. “No,” she said, her voice just a whisper. “Love isn’t ever going to be enough for us.” Her voice was a sob. “I’ve known I’m in love with you from the first time we made love.” Her voice lowered. “I knew you loved me on the side of the road when I started that second fire.”

  He laughed. “You knew before I did?” He grabbed her hands. “Of course, you did. Cher, you get me.”

  “I know how hard it was for you to come here and tell me…”

  “Coming to accept it was hard, but telling you is easy. I love you. I want you to come back to Sugar Mill and marry me. I love you and Joey loves you.”

  “Oh, God.” She grabbed her stomach; she looked miserable. “I don’t want to hurt you. I know you are handing me your precious, dear heart. I can’t take it. I wish I could. God knows, I wish I could, Ben. I can’t.”

  Ben felt like he had been punched in the chest, then he remembered she had said she loved him. “Sorry, cher, but I won’t accept ‘I can’t.’”

  “Don’t be stubborn. Don’t dig your heels in.”

  “They’re already dug, darling. I know what you are trying to do. I know why. You are afraid of tomorrows. I’m not asking for tomorrows. I want you for today. If we don’t have a tomorrow, at least I’ve had you for today.”

  He pulled her against him and held her so tight he felt her heart pounding. “Ben, I found a lump.”

  He felt his heart stop. He eased back to look at her. “Are you okay?”

  “That’s not the point,” she cried.

  “Answer me, Elli. Are you okay?” His voice was full of concern and impatience.

  “Tell me right now, when you are wondering if I have cancer, that you are also wondering if it was big mistake to ask me to marry you.” She swiped at the tears. “I can’t drag you and Joey into my world.”

  “Are you okay?” he asked more firmly.

  “Yes. The lump was benign. It was probably a contusion from my battle with Doug, but the oncologists did a biopsy anyway.”

  Ben blew out a breath. His head felt lighter. Her hands felt warmer in his. “Is that why you left? You found the lump while you were at Sugar Mill?”

  She nodded. “I was scared. I didn’t want to drag you and your family into that dark, debilitating fear.”

  Ben hugged her again. “We are all afraid of things, cher. Fear drives us all. Even the dogs.” He looked into her eyes. “How we deal with our fears is what determines our character, our mark on the world.”

  “I want to have thousands of todays with you, Ben, and with Joey.” She stepped away from him. “But I can’t do that to you two. What if the cancer returns? What if I die?”

  “People die. No one leaves this world without dying. It’s just how it is. Children die, old people die. My question to you is why in the hell aren’t you living? Really living. Heart and soul and gusto living. Take chances. Let me take chances with you.”

  “Deep in the recesses of my heart and mind, I know you’re right. I’m not sure I can let go of the fear, though.”

  “Take a chance with me, Elli.” Ben stepped closer to her again. “I’m asking you to love me back, cher. My eyes are wide open and so is my heart. None of us knows when our time will come. All we have is this single moment. I want my moment.
I want our moments.” He went down on one knee.

  “Oh, Ben.” She didn’t take her eyes off of him. “I want this moment and the next with you. I’m so blasted selfish to want it. Please let me be magnanimous. Let me do the right thing.”

  He shook his head. “The right thing is to say yes. I can’t imagine how horrible the longing and loneliness will be if you say no. How much worse could losing you be than to never wake up with you in my arms, to never let Joey read bedtime stories to us together as the sun sets over the cane fields, to never play with our dogs along the banks of the bayou shouting at the gators to stay away?”

  The dogs moved closer to where Ben remained on bended knee. BJ sniffed his neck. Jenny and Doe sat on either side of him and looked up at her. “This isn’t fair. You are all ganging up on me.”

  “Dogs know instinctively what they want and go after it.” He smiled. “They don’t worry about anything else. They just live in the moment. Live in the moment with me, Elli. Marry me.”

  “Ben, are you sure you understand what you get with me?”

  He smiled, hearing a bit of surrender in her question. “Darlin’, I know exactly what I’m getting and I like it.” Now, he knew it was time to hand Elli his heart. “I wanted to believe you were a deceiving, manipulative conniver because I was so battered by Sarah’s deception, manipulation, and conniving. But you charmed me. You made me laugh. You made me want to believe you were just like the woman you presented to me. I didn’t realize it at the time, but I wanted it so much that I risked gossip and ridicule by my family to see if you were really that person I liked being around.” He inhaled like he had taken a blow to his gut. “Finding the e-mails was awful, Elli. I felt like I had been played a fool. It reinforced my original expectations of you. You were just like Sarah…only I couldn’t believe that was true.” He shook his head. “My heart said that wasn’t right, but my head said it had to be. Head or heart?” He smiled. “Heart.” He kissed her hand. “The character of the woman I saw working and playing on the plantation seemed real. The fact that Joey and Tante Izzy loved you also gave me pause. I came to California wanting answers, but the truth is, I knew here,” he pressed his palm over his heart, “that I only came here to bring you home.”

  “Ben, I…”

  “Let me finish, Elli.” He smiled. “I worked on this part in case I would need it.” He cleared his throat. “‘I would rather have one breath of her hair, one kiss of her mouth, one touch of her hand than an eternity without it.’”

  Elli sighed. “City of Angels.” She sat on his bended knee.

  “It’s the most perfect thing you could have said at this moment.” She smiled a tender smile. “I want to live each and every moment with you, Ben. I want whatever we can have together. Living without you hasn’t been living. I love you so much.” Her smile widened. “Yes, I’ll marry you.” She threw her arms around his neck and Ben felt her joy bolt through him. The dogs jumped on them, tails wagging. “I think the girls approve.”

  Epilogue

  My dearest Bosom Blog buddies. Fear kept me from having real hope and real dreams for a future. I tried to label it as something else…being selfless, honorable, practical, even caring. The truth is, I was afraid to hope and to have that hope dashed away. I was afraid to dream of a wonderful tomorrow and to have that dream taken from me. I was so frightened of the emotional pain and heartache, that I thought avoiding the things that brought me joy would save me from it. It took a man and a small child and a pack of dogs to show me that fear is worse than death. We only have this moment, right now…shouldn’t we live it with unconditional love and joy…like a child? Fear barricades us from that gift. When you see a puppy rolling in the grass or greeting you with its tail wagging and his tongue hanging to the side, think of that gift of living in the moment and thank God we have it. Dare to walk away from the fear.

  I am living my dream. I want you that for you, too. You deserve it, E.

  Bosom Blog Buddies Post

  They were all dressed in red-carpet formals; Elli in a pale purple, low-back sequined gown, Ben and Joey in traditional black tuxedoes, Tante Izzy in a shocking pink chiffon with a chartreuse sash around her waist. While Elli was being escorted by who she dubbed the most handsome men there, Ben and Joey hadn’t caused as much of a commotion as Tante Izzy’s “dates”—the extraordinarily handsome Bienvenu brothers, Beau and Jackson. Beau looked expensive and classic in his tailored black Armani tux, crisp white shirt and black bow tie. Jackson, who just retired from the Navy JAG and moved back to Cane the week before, looked strong and sexy. He wore his formal dress white uniform waist jacket, evening blue trousers, dark bow tie, gold cummerbund, and gold Navy insignia cuff links. The paparazzi went mad with curiosity and intrigue over the gorgeous eligible bachelors, taking thousands of pictures of them and Tante Izzy, as they walked into the theater behind Sam Cooper and Heather Harley. The director had fallen in love with Tante Izzy and worked her into four more scenes in the movie. She was even featured in the trailer. Despite all the movie excitement, Tante Izzy claimed her biggest thrill was being named to the board of the Gene I.D. Foundation. The woman was full of surprises. As a wedding present to Elli and Ben, she donated two million dollars of her oil money to the foundation. With one million in an endowment and the other million available for their clients and operating costs, Elli was able to hire a wonderful director for the day-to-day operations in California and make time to share the responsibilities with Abby in dealing with the LAPD and their investigation. Most importantly, she could now be Joey’s mommy, work at the kennel, and be a good wife to her dream man.

  Ben kissed Elli on the cheek as they watched Tante Izzy being interviewed by Entertainment Tonight. “She’s going to want to star in the next two films that are scheduled to come to Sugar Mill, you know?” He smiled. “You are responsible for this.”

  “Aunt Rosa is.” She turned and moved into his arms. “You know I didn’t quite understand why she gave us each half of the plantation. I get it now.”

  “Yeah? I’m still in the dark there, cher.”

  “From what I’ve discovered, she was an empathetic and intuitive woman. A good woman. She knew I was alone and you had boarded your heart up tight. She forced two lonely, damaged people together. She wanted to give me a family and dogs to love and to care for me. She wanted to give you a woman who would love you and not your status and wealth.”

  “Speaking of Rosa’s dogs…” He smiled a mischievous smile. “I think it’s a good time to tell you about them, considering we are in a crowded public event and you wouldn’t want to make a scene to embarrass us in front of the paparazzi.” He smiled again. “You know those really well-behaved, beautiful golden labs at the kennel? They are yours. They are the dogs Rosa really gave you. The girls crowding our bed every night came from the pound.”

  “What? Are you kidding me? I own six dogs. I think I’m going to faint.” Elli turned, faced him, and lifted her shoulders in a big shrug. “Oh well.”

  “Uh-oh. What are you not telling me, cher?”

  “You remember Donna?” He just looked at her. “Well,” she batted her eyes at him and smiled. “I actually didn’t sell her to a Hollywood dog handler, like I told you.” She batted her eyes in false flirtation. “She was never really my dog. I rented her from that high-end dog handler to impress you when I first came to Sugar Mill. When he refused to sell Donna to me, I had to give her back to him.”

  He looked at Elli for a single beat then burst out laughing. “To impress me?” They both laughed, realizing they’d each used the dogs to fool the other. He hugged her. “Cher, you are as unpredictable as a surprise birthday party.”

  Elli looked up at him and kissed him on his chin. She softened her voice and leaned into him. “‘Darling, the party is where you are.’” Elli kissed Ben on the cheek. “That was Lana Turner in The Bad and The Beautiful.”

  He leaned in and nibbled on Elli’s ear. “I’ll show you the bad and the beautiful at the party in our b
edroom later.” He reached into his pocket. “And to assure we have a good time, I have this.” He handed her the amber vial with the love potion still inside.

  Elli threw her head back and laughed.

  Hope you enjoyed Elli’s story. Please take a minute and leave a review at Goodreads, Amazon, or wherever you purchased this book. Tell your friends, family and co-workers, and then s tay tuned for the next tale from Tina DeSalvo…

  Jewel

  A Second Chance Novel

  When antiques’ expert and picker, Jewel Durand arrives at Sugar Mill Plantation with her grandmother, Mignon, and turns Beau Bienvenu’s nice tidy world upside down. Jewel is determined to help her grandmother find a lost twin sister that she mentioned having for the first time just a few weeks ago while they were watching a movie where the beautiful Sugar Mill Plantation appeared painted in a shocking pink color. Not only did Jewel’s grandmother claim she had a twin sister, but she said she had lived on that plantation. Mignon’s memory is far from reliable but Jewel can’t just discount her insistent claims to her failing memory. She must do what she does best, research and investigate the past to find out if her grandmother’s sibling exists before dementia takes Mignon away from her forever. She owes that to the woman who has been more mother to her than her real mother, the famous Bourbon Street stripper, Miss Prailine.

  Beau will always protect the Bienvenu family first and foremost. They had rescued him and his brother from a life of abuse and neglect when they were young boys. He is suspicious that the strangely behaving grandmother and gorgeous granddaughter may be a threat to his family because of the questions they are asking about the Bienvenu history. They could be con artists trying to stake a claim to a family trust that has been held in waiting for a missing heir that disappeared over eighty years ago. Beau will do anything to defend the people who gave him a Second Chance in life. Jewell will never stop until she has answers for the woman who gave her hers. Two people grateful to others for their Second Chance on life…but never really claiming it as their own.